I feel like a bad horse parent.-Accident May 3

[amby]

I must say that after today I'm not sure if my horse will ever let me back on.

Casper and I have been back undersaddle since last Wednesday. He is doing wonderfully. However today I did two things that he hates (or maybe I just think he does).

1.) Julie, the instructor that teaches at the ASU Equine Center (where Casper is boarded) has a Western Pleasure mare that she only uses for lessons. I have reallly gotten in the show mood recently and because I have never had the chance to show and Casper isn't quite ready, Julie is letting me get Chassey (the mare) ready for the Saturday night shows at the barn. Though I am very excited, Casper was SOOOO mad when I was working her. He glared at me the whole time I tacked her up, and when I rode her in the arena, you could hear him whinnying in the barn. he had a fit!!!

2.) Then I decided to leave him out tonight against my better judgement. It might RAIN!! Casper never stays out in the rain. He has trees but no run in. I am so worried that something will happen, though the weather man says only a 30% chance of rain until 6am then an 80% Chance of a storm, but I should be up by then. I just don't like the idea of my horse being wet unless I made him wet.

Well, maybe he'll forgive me, eventually.

[wisteriafarms]

Amby, your boy sounds so much like mine in so many ways lol! Amistad is very loving, and I always give him big, loud kisses right on that soft spot between his nostrils...he just eats it up lol. Well, he shares a pasture with his half-brother (among others) and Tornack is also very loving. One day, without thinking, I gave Tornack a smooch on his nose. Amistad was in the next stall watching. He had a FIT!! Squealing and spinning, trying to push his nose through the bars... Boy, did I feel awful . He was so upset and jealous. And, he also gives me these longing gazes when he sees me riding his mama, or runs up to the fence and whinnies if we pass close by. BUT, he still loves on me when I love on him lol, and my 'infidelities' have not affected our 'relationship' lol. I actually think that now that I ride him, he watches me on other horses...it sounds crazy, but I actually think he rides better after he sees me riding someone else. Like he is either trying to show the other horse up lol, or he sees how he should be behaving.
Casper will be fine . You are a good mama for thinking about his feelings though .

[patty dukes]

I was remembering a funny story about my horse when I read this..............
It starts out we were boarding a horse for a family member A STUD. My horse wouldn't let him breed her but he was HERS!!! We found that out when 2 family members (one was the owner of the stud and the other was a cousin to my husband) came up on 2 mares the stud was very interested in those females. My mare wasn't going to stand for that she was biting him and then turned to buck him!!! That wasn't funny but what I thought was funny is that my mare was jealous with him looking at another female!
I imagine your horse thinks of you as his human and got jealous. I would think that he would let you ride him again.
As far as leaving him outside I can see why you would be worried about that if you haven't left him out b4. I am a witness to no sleep because of worring and you probally didn't sleep well that night. Your horse is very beautiful.
I have just learned that when the weather man says a certian percentage of rain like the 30% that means that 30% of the viewing area is likely to get rain. I thought like when it says 80% that we were getting rain well we didn't we were in the 20% that didn't get it.
I have rambled on enough.

[amby]

Yes, he let me ride him again!! He seems to be getting used to me working Chassey, he just gets extra kisses. I must say though that tonight was HORRIBLE!! All my fault too!!!

Alright, There were atleast 5 other horses in the arena, that makes this story quite interesting. There were jumps and barrels how confusing is that. So we started lunging and he was SOOO relaxed and responsive so I decided to get on him. Well I obviously didn't have the saddle tight enough because as I (from the mounting block) attempted to get on, it slipped underhis belly.

I fell away from him and the girl holding the lunge line (still attatched to the bit-yes, we lunge attached to the bit) followed him as far as she could, but he got away. The barrel people didn't have the gate closed but they tried to block him. He did one lap around the arena at a full out canter then went out the gate (through the horse in the way!!!) He ended up in a corner and let me get him.

So I undid the saddle and we calmed down and lunged a bit in the arena. Then we went back to the saddle and pad and put the pad on. THen the saddle, then cinched it up, then lunged a bit.

He seemed alright so i took him back in the barn, took the english saddle off and put a western saddle on. Then we went back into the arena and lunged and I rode him a bit. He seemed fine. A bit jumpy but still responive. We didn't do anything hard, just walk and gait.

Should I have done anything different??

[bndranch]

I don't know you or your horse Amby and I REALLY don't want to sound rude or mean in anyway so PLEASE don't take this wrong. Again I don't know all the background behind you or your horse but just what I read........
Your horse to me lives in a bubble. He has one of the most sheltered lives and so when something out of the ordinary happens he doesn't know what to do (again this is just based on what I have read). With ALL my horses I welcome change, I welcome scarey objects, I welcome crazy things. It is better to TRAIN for the scarey objects then to encounter them and the horse not know what to do.
I used to be ALOT like you. I had an 11 yr old untrained arabian gelding who was scared of his own shadow. I too was a VERY green rider. I made sure EVERYTHING was planned and nothing would go wrong....but no matter how hard I tried something always happened. I learned as I got older I can't control what happens around me so I better start controlling how my horse sees these horse eating monsters!!!! For example my arab was TERRIFIED of cows and it was free range where I first boarded him. I would be out riding and a cow would be walking toward us and he would FREAK. So I would take him out just in his halter and chase the cows leading him. It worked and he never had a problem with it again (now he lives with a herd of cows).
Also I have kids and you never know what a kid is going to do so instead of having my kids tiptoe around my horses if I am working them my kids run rampent (granted I am at my house and my property not a boarding facility). My horses are fine with things come right at them, or bicycles being ridden around them or behind them. The other day we were flying kites and my mare at first freaked out, but did we stop.......NO, we kept right on doing it.
Pretty much what I am saying you control what is going to happen and where it is going to happen. Granted you can't predict everything all the time but it will help. Last weekend we were at at a playday and some F14 or F18 jets did a very LOW flyby. IT was the LOUDEST noise I have ever heard and of course above all the horses heads. Now THAT there is no way you can train for, BUT my mare was one of the few that did not freak out. She just figured that it was normal.
The only thing I would have personally changed about what happened is not blame the commotion that is happening in the arena. Use those as training oppertunities to get him used to that. Also you said the lunge line was attatched to the bit ( I am assuming you use a snaffle since you are doing dressage). I take the lunge line and run it through the bit and over the poll and attatch it to the other side of the bit. Gives you alot more control then just attatching it to the one side of the bit. I think you did the right thing about taking him right back and lunging him some more and guess what he did fine!!!!
You are NOT a horrible person and this was NOT a horrible accident.......nobody got hurt!!!! You also ended on a very positive note! Another thing you need to remember to stay calm too, if you get wound up that will make Casper more up as well....
Again good luck Amby!
Brittany

[amby]

Brittany,
THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! I agree with you whole heartedly. Casper has led a VERY sheltered life and that is why I got him out last night. Before I got him a year ago he had been basically a pasture horse and the occasional trail horse. (His old barn was located in his pasture so he could run in if he needed out of the weather.)
He had never seen an arena. He had never been to a show. He had never seen a circus, or an elephant, or a clydesdale, or a tractor, or a jumping horse, or a barrel horse, or cows. or, or .or, anything.
So I have started trying to expose him to certain things. He is at a school barn that rents the arena out to different things including the Lippizaner stallions (what a FUN night for me), a circus, and a lawn mower race, not to mention the shows that are EVERY saturday night during the summer. He has calmed down CONSIDERABLY, I just felt HORRIBLE, because it was my fault for not tightening the girth. I just didn't want to pinch him. I'm beginning to think that a pinch would be better than what we got.
As for the lunge line, I'm not sure why, but my trainer has me do it that way. Because I have so little experience I pretty well do as she says, but I'll certainly ask her about he other way. Yes it is a snaffle. Our new stuff came in today So we'll be working in a French LInk loose ring snaffle from now on.
Brittany, I do TRUELY appreciate the advice and support. The girls at the barn mean well until something goes wrong, then they stand in their corner and gossip. I think that frustrated me more than anything. But we got through. And though he is a little stiff, he is not lame or anything. I may give him and epsom salt sponge bath today to soothe those sore muscles. I know I'm taking a hot bath tonight!!

[bndranch]

LOL I am so glad you didn't take it wrong! You and Casper sound so much like what Topik and I delt with for so long!! He was bought as a weanling and from the time he was a weanling until we bought him at 11 he was a pasture ornament! He was brought in EVERY night and during nasty weather. During the day he had his own pasture with his own creek and his own self to do whatever he chose. He was a VERY pushy gelding who the owners did what HE said not vice versa!
We bought him and put him into 3 months of HARD training (looking back it wasn't the best trainer but what do you do). He coliced within the first week, so that put a little damper on things.
Granted he will never be rock solid like my other horses, he wasn't brought up that way. BUT I will tell you this......He taught me how to ride! I couldn't be just a passenger, I had to learn to ride. He is the reason I became the rider who I am today. I also found out to take everyone's comments with a grain of salt. EVERYONE does things different and EVERYONE is going to have a different opinon on the matter.......Just remember he is YOUR horse not theirs. Ignore their snickers and their gossip. Most of those people would like to think they can ride when in reality they have horses that are so trained that if their horse tripped they would have a coniption fit!
Keep at it Amby, you both will only become stronger and better in the end!

[amby]

Sounds like you and Topik had an Interesting beginning also. LOL. Casper's previous owner was a bit intimidated with Casper, because he is large horse. Casper has had 30 days professesional trainer that I wouldn't send ANY horse too. But that's just me. He was never exposed to anything but the trail every six months or so. And if he misbehaved they would just lunge him until he didn't have the energy to behave. (Effective in a pinch, but not effective training long term unless used regularly in schooling).
So the first week I had Casper a "friend" offered to put 30 more days on him. She took my normally quite horse and had him rearing and resisting in no time flat. A few days later she had him tied in the arena (at my request) while I was at work. She tied him REALLY long and something spooked him and he reared again. When he came down his feet got tangled in the lead and he got REALLY cut up. (13 staples in his face).
After that we spent alot of time healing and bonding. I started riding him in September 06. I had a riding class at school and rode Casper in it. He was a smooth ride, but "slightly" out of control. LOL We stayed in the Arena. In december we got a gaited saddle. It ended up underhis belly (much like Thursday night). Following that he wouldn't let anyone near him with a saddle or saddle pad.
We got a new trainer (our current one, who is WONDERFUL working with sensitive and/or troubled horses.)
We have grown over the past year and have a bond that even my trainer can't believe. It shouldn't work but it does.

[patty dukes]

I have learned so much on this site. I also learn from reading everyones stories. I have laughed, and cried on these stories but most of all I have learned from them. Thank you all for posting your experiences.


For this I ask......
I have a 13 yr old stallion. He is a very good horse. I was reading about lunging with the bit. When I lunge Red I just clip it to his halter and he knows what to do. I control his speed with a buggy whip that I hit the ground with. I never hit him with the whip but the faster I hit the ground the faster he lunges. I don't let him get too fast just a good pace. When I stop him I say come here and he comes up to me. I am greatful that someone else taught him everything he knows but reading the use of the bit when lunging makes me wonder how come Red lunges so well with just the halter. I am glad he knows what to do and what I am doing to him but I also know that it isn't always a good thing that someone else taught him everything he knows.

I was told by a woman that owns the stables down the road that if you hold up a stick like a whip it makes the horse think you are as big as they are.

I think my mare was a buggy horse so when she sees a whip she gets away.
She is real jumpy and easily spooked. (we are working on that and she is getting better......correction we WERE working on that until she foaled)
I could take the lead rope and swing it over back around her legs ect... She jumped the first couple times but after that she just stood there.

[twnpnds]

Hi Amby. Awww you're a good mom to Casper. Don't cut yourself down so bad. You're not the only one sweetie. We have all been there and done that. You know, done things that make us feel stupid, embarrassed, and even a little mad. So don't let those snickers from others get to you. Learn to laugh it off and go on. Hint: When you smile and laugh so does your horse! And it really does make others wonder what you're up to. I agree with Brittany. Exposure is everything. And staying cool and calm is another. You tense the slightest bit and Casper starts thinking, "Hummm, something's got Mom on the alert." So he goes on the alert and starts looking for boogers. And wouldn't ya know it? He finds lots of them. LOL. Don't worry about him being out. Horses were made to be outside. So many are in pastures with shelter and there they stand out in the rain and snow. My mule's one of those. I'm not saying horses shouldn't be inside. Just saying if it's nice out it won't hurt him and he probably likes it. And since Casper is white, it's better he's out at night and not in the sun for long periods of time. Might want to spray him for skeeters though. You've come a long way with Casper and I'm proud of you. And yes, he will forgive you. He loves you too much not to.

[twnpnds]

Patty, you were asking about using a bit for lunging. Sometimes a bit is used when you need a little extra control for some horses. Especially those that like to go a little too fast and not listen to you when lunging. Obviously your stallion does not need a bit. Some people hook the lunge line to one ring of the bit, some run it through one ring and over the poll to the other ring, and some run it through both rings under the chin. Just a matter of preference and how much control you need. You were saying that you thought your mare might have been a buggy horse. She might have been but more than likely she has been hit/abused with a whip. Even if she has never been hit, someone popping one behind her a lot will have the same effect sometimes.

[wisteriafarms]

Amby, I keep meaning (and trying) to post a reply here... seems like things keep happening to prevent it lol (computer rebooting itself after I've typed 'a novel', kids suddenly with a crisis that only mom can fix lol...etc.).
Anyway, I agree completely with Brittany and twnpnds. Keep exposing Casper to new things, even just going for walks on the lead. You did the right thing by continuing his session after the 'horse eating saddle' episode . Always end on a good note so that he will remember that, and not the mishap. Sometimes it will even mean ending after only 5 or 10 minutes if he does exactly what you want right off the bat.
And I have to emphasize what was said about Casper picking up on whether you are nervous or tense. Sometimes knowing that makes it harder to not be nervous lol, just yesterday when I got on Amistad without lunging him first I was so worried about how he would respond that when I sat in the saddle my left leg was shaking like mad. I had to laugh, but he was tense until I relaxed and my leg stopped shaking. It doesn't have to be something that obvious, it can just be the tone of your voice. One of my favorite quotes to keep in mind while working with horses is: "Our horses are constantly asking us questions, and we are constantly answering them. If you are unsure of the questions your horse is asking, perhaps you should be concerned about the answers you are giving." Always pay attention to your body language and tone of your voice.
Lastly, don't worry about those girls twittering to each other in the corner. If they were good people (horse people or otherwise) they would be offering to help you, not standing there acting better than you. Chances are, they were handed bomb-proof horses and have never had to deal with the issues that you and Casper are addressing.

Basically, Brittany and twnpnds have already said everything that I wanted to, and said it much better than I would've lol. But just remember that we're behind you

[amby]

Girls, I love you all so much!! The advice has been WONDERFUL!! I must say that I had gotten VERY discouraged after last weeks accident, I just wonder sometimes if this is the Right thing you know, for Casper and me. But then I'll go sit in his stall and cry because growing up is hard or because of a test or a decision, or just because I want to cry. And he'll look at his grain, then leave it and come blow on my face and nuzzle my tears away. He'll nicker when I come to the barn and lean out the door when I leave. Then we'll work and like today (with a new stud in the arena) he'll get excited but won't do anything more than gait really fast. He's mine, whether it's difficult or easy and whether or not we meet the standards and textbooks of others doesn't matter any more. He's mine. I love him for what and who he is. My 15.2 White, Kinda-Gaited pleasure horse. We're gonna ride Western and English just because we can.

I just want you girls to know how AWESOME you are. I know that when something goes wrong I can go home and tell yall and you will be there to listen and give great feedback. so casper and I THANK_YOU a thousand times!!

[jthomas99]

Casper is so lucky to have you as a Mom! You are becoming a real team... just keep at it! You are doing great! Someday the two of you will be awesome!